Dr. Sherry Gaba, LSCW, authored an article on Psychology Today discussing the mother wound. In short, the mother wound is the loss or lack of mothering a child experiences in their adolescent years. A loss or lack of mothering can range from mothers who physically abandoned their children, struggled with mental illnesses, or were drug addicts or alcoholics.Though these are the most acknowledged conditions, there are some less extreme qualifying characteristics; such as the mo

“Don’t compromise your standard to get them to participate.” -Ms. Lockwood If you’ve ever worked in the public education sector, you understand the pressure that comes with having your performance consistently measured. I want to maintain a high standard but at times feel defeated by feedback that looks like non participation, criticism (from students), low scores, etc. In an effort to sooth the anxiety, I’ll create “alternatives” or take a more passive approach with select s

-Sister-Mother Maxine Waters If you make it your business to pursue purpose by any means necessary, you will realize that balancing the many responsibilities that come with this path is a consistent mind game. It is as if the moment you establish a routine, another perfect opportunity appears, a relationship needs you, or a problem arises that demands your immediate attention. What’s interesting is that even though you asked to be “booked and busy,” you get overwhelmed just l

Humans are complex dynamic beings who have the potential to embody unique perspectives and create original insights. But let’s be real here, when it comes to our biological nature and basic needs, nothing is new under the sun. If you’re like me and grew up in the church being told that you must have faith and believe that you already have a thing before it shows up, then you likely understand the dilemma this engrained belief has the potential to cause as it relates to naviga

#FeminineTipFriday | Fuck It | Noun| the point where doing all you can meets there is nothing left to do; the art of surrender on steroids. I’m not saying 2020 is whooping my ass, but she has an undefeated three piece combo! This year did not come to play and though I consider myself a person who loves to take on a good challenge, this right here...I was NOT prepared for. Its cool to be positive, but let’s be real, if you’re anything like me you’ve likely had days that you st

Experts have long encouraged people that a healthy fitness journey is based on the formula; 20% working out and 80% what you eat. The sentiment is that no matter how much you train your physical body it will be nearly impossible to obtain or sustain the results you want if your diet is not in alignment with your fitness goals. Whether you want to lose, gain, sustain, or tone- your physique will be a direct reflection of your overall lifestyle choices. I contend that the same

With this whole Will & Jada Entanglement party going on, I can’t lie and say that I have not thoroughly enjoyed the jokes, memes, and dance remixes to this highly anticipated, yet historically short Red Table “Confessions” Talk. Though I’m on the boat that the entire situation is none of our business, I also believe that once the secret is out its out, and it’s fair game to play with. With that being said, this is not an attempt to dissect or diagnose The Smith’s relationship

“Valleys are purposeful. They open our eyes, strengthen our minds, teach us faith, strength, and patience. These are all essential mountain climbing skills.” -Iyanla Vanzant Recall the last big problem you experienced that caused you the greatest frustration, evoked fear and anxiety, or became too much to handle so you busied yourself to avoid feeling the truth of your inner reality. This is resistance. |Re-sist-ance| noun| is the refusal to accept or comply with something; t

“A sister is both your mirror and your opposite.” –Elizabeth Fishel There is nothing worse than having a piece of food stuck in your teeth; hair out of place; or a suspicious thing bulging from your nose and no one says anything! By this time you’ve smiled feverishly at dozens of people, photobombed a few pictures, and talked incessantly with a friend who has all but allowed you to look like you’ve rebelled against personal hygiene. We’ve all been on both sides of this conspi

Speak-TF-up| noun| the act of voicing ones feelings or thoughts as it relates to a woman’s core values & beliefs despite the fear of rejection, abandonment, or judgement Research has marked public speaking as one of the top 5 fears people have. It interest me to understand the fears that could possibly hide behind this phenomena that so many people, no matter the ethnicity, gender, or occupation experience. One could only question; is it the crowd size? Is it because they don

Do You Want Love or Do You Want to Be Right? I think we all have a little Molly in us, more than we’d like to admit. What I mean is that Molly (Insecure Season 4 Episode 9) has a pattern (so eloquently pointed out by Dr.Rhonda, her therapist, and boyfriend Andrew) that she tends to put a wall up and jump to defenses when she feels justified or wronged. She can also be unforgiving and relentless in her perspective. In and of itself this is not bad, its a protective mechanism u

You can only expect what you choose to stand by. Daniel Scott describes the difference between standards and expectations: “A standard is a level of quality, something that is accepted as a norm, and generally used as a basis for judgment. An expectation is a strong belief that something is going to happen in the future, or a feeling that someone or something is going to achieve something.” For example, most public school districts (depending on the state you live) have acade

Why do we look for the living among the dead? -Luke 24:5 “I just don’t know how much longer he expects me to wait.” “I just wish I knew what he was thinking you know so I won’t waste my time” “Why can’t he just be honest and tell me straight up? “ “I really wish I would’ve stayed home!” “I don’t know...I guess we’re just seeing where it goes.” “I gave so much to that company, how could they just let me go!?” When the Gray Area Turns us Blue The gray area is the infamous space

Ode to love’s painful past...I mean future...? Does the silent aching fear of being cheated on ever go away? Sometimes I like to think I am stronger than I am. That somehow I am immune to what some may consider a simple insecurity, but the more I reflect and go deeper into my own inner world, this is a bruise that at times still stings, even when no one has touched it. Writing has been the sugar to deliver the bitter medicine initiating me to examine the roots of some of my h